Head Over Heels

According to NG, he is “feeling head over heels” for me.  He’s also out of town again, but this time it’s only a four day trip so his promise not to ever leave me for a long trip ever again still stands untarnished.  He has this theory that I should not have any fun while he’s gone so that I’ll be really happy when he comes home.  After the last trip, when my mother-in-law died and I had a stressful job change, I told him that wouldn’t stand.  He’s no longer allowed to wish me misery while he’s gone.  I knew my dad was having heart surgery today and the last thing I needed was someone hoping I was miserable this week!

I tried to explain to him my philosophy that when he’s out of town, I hope he’s having a good time both because I care about him and because otherwise, his being out of town is a complete waste of valuable time that we could otherwise be spending together.  It also works in reverse.  If I go out of town, I’ll hope he’s having a good time at home both because I care about his happiness and because I’ll feel less guilty for having fun while I’m gone.

I like this philosophy because it’s positive and somewhat altruistic while at the same time maintaining a certain selfish core.  I want him to have a good time both for his sake, and for mine.  Life is about finding balance, after all.  By the end, he seemed to appreciate the concept.  Sadly, I am not having much fun this week, with or without his support.  I’ve mostly been working and doing chores around the house.  It’s good stuff to do but I wouldn’t classify it as fun!